Conversation 1
This lovely elderly man was admitted with urinary retention, and subsequently developed a urinary tract infection. While examining him, I proceeded to ask him the routine 10 AMTS (Abbreviated Mental Test Score) questions.
One of the questions was, "What do you think my occupation is, if you look at me?"
Bear in mine that I was wearing a simple blouse and trousers, with my stethoscope hanging around my neck, and my pager stuck to my pocket.
He gave me a good look, and said, "Well, you're a beauty queen."
hmmm.....I wish I was. He scored 5/10....so guess he was pretty confused eh?
Conversation 2
A locum orthopaedic doctor came to my ward to review a patient of mine who possibly has a broken pubic rami. He examined the patient thoroughly as you would. Then, he started to write his findings down in the notes. While doing so, he looked up and asked, "Is it better to write; there is good moving of the right leg, OR there is good movement in the right leg?"
I know I really shouldn't be laughing at others, whom English is not their first language. I tried really hard to stifle my giggles. My colleague told him that the latter sentence was a better of describing the patient's range of movement. It was amazing that he could keep a straight face while doing so.
Conversation 3
There was a pleasant elderly lady in the ward. Unfortunately, most of us, when we grow older, we will lose our hearing. This lady was nearly 90 years old, and she looked alot younger than that. I asked her whether she smokes. She replied, "Well, yes I do...you know, its really hard to get rid of this habit."
"How many do you smoke in a day?" I asked.
"hmm...about 4 to 5 a day."
"Oh ok...so about 4-5 a day...."I repeated as I make a note of it on my records.
She said," No....not 45 a day....it is 4 TO 5 a day."
I laughed...and told her that I know she said 4 to 5, and not 45.
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