Here is a peep into my thoughts on the events taking place in my life, either at work or socially, that may be outrageously insane or interestingly logical.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Time Out
arrghh.... what a lovely start to my 1 week holiday eh?
I could only drive my car from the test centre back to my home. It is illegal to be driving a car without a MOT in the UK.
So, I have to find a repair centre to fix my car. Apparently, due to an accident 2 years ago, the damage to the car has started to present itself. The radiator is leaking loads, the metal thing that holds both of my front car tyres is twisted,....and as a result of this, the tyres have worn out. The exhaust pipe is "funny"....etc...
The lady at the MOT counter said, "I suggest to go to your insurance company to make a claim."
I was rather shocked. It sounded as though my car needed a massive operation! I can't imagine how much this repair is going to cost me.......and my agony has been prolonged with the fact that it is bank holiday monday here. Therefore, I can only get a quotation for the repair, at the earliest, on Tuesday! This is so frustrating.
If I make a claim from my car insurance, I would lose my NCB! I was thinking, if the price is about 500 pounds, I would pay it on my own, but anything more, I will ask the insurance company to fork it out.
Also, in view of the damages, I was thinking that maybe this is an excuse for me to get another car! I could get a higher CC car, with air conditioning? ahh..i dunno. It is a question of whether to pay few HUNDREDS to fix the car, or pay few THOUSANDS to get a new one......decisions, decisions!!!
Sigh. And now, I have just paid at least 150 pounds to rent a car for the week, just so that I can take me family around visiting....
This is just so troublesome, and stressful too.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Getting Out of My Comfort Zone
1. New job
yeap...the new job started in the first week of august. It kicked off with an induction on day 01. Then, I had 1 day off, before I started my night on calls. It wasn't too bad...guess I was expecting worse. The only bad thing about starting off with night on calls was I didn't know how the whole hospital functions! I didnt know how to do simple matters, like taking blood cultures or even obtaining a radiology card to request for a chest x-ray!
The hospital at night also works so differently from my previous job. There were no nurse practitioners, no clinical support worker. And, we have to walk around carrying PDAs?! We receive our task list via the PDA....I thought it was rather fancy...but actually, carrying that gadget is so troublesome! I have to remind myself to tick the boxes on the PDA and also, charge the battery when it runs low.
System is different, but I'll slowly pick it up, I'm sure...its all about adapting!
2. New flat
=D yes....finally I can rent the whole flat by myself! woo hoo!! hehe...I have moved into a 2 bedroom flat, which is literally less than 2 miles away from the hospital....it is SO convenient. No more long distance travel....I can wake up later, get ready slowly, and I can leave my flat later too.... such pleasure!
Did I tell you about the pleasure of living on my own?? I get the whole flat to myself, of course! haha. No more loud music when I am not up for it, no more dirty sink or messy kitchen, more space for me in the fridge, no one intruding into my roon without permission....and no more using my laptop behind my back! yay! it is simply fantastic!
oh...I also got myself a little something....keke....yes....it is not little actually. In fact, it is a 32 inch LCD TV! I know, I know, 32 inches is not THAT big....but heck, this is my first TV, purchased with my own hardwork! It felt great.... The size of the TV is just about right for my wee flat. =) I am loving the fact that I can seat on my sofa, and enjoy watching what I wanna watch....I wasn't really able to do that in my previous flat coz me housemate used to watch all the soaps on the TV all night.
3. New environment
A survey 1-2 years ago said that M'bro is the worst place to live in the UK! Now, that is really intimidating for a newbie like me. I moved from a lively city, Glasgow, to a quieter place like M'bro. Not saying that Glasgow does not have its rough bits, but I don't think it is in the top 10 of the worst place to live.
Anywho, the area I'm living in doesnt seem too bad. The buildings and restaurants definitely do not look as interesting or eye-catching as Byres Road or the Merchant City. I have yet to pass by a nice looking cafe....I really miss hanging out in TinderBox or Berits n Browns.
I miss my shopping in Glasgow!! The best shopping experience here would be in Gateshead Metro Centre, which is a good 1 hours drive from here. Otherwise, the nearest retail park is at Teeside...which is actually decent. You can find the usual high street shops, just in smaller sizes. There is also a TGIF! haha.
The weather here also seems warmer and drier than cold wet Glasgow!
4. New look
I was really tired of my bob hairstyle...and decided to just go back to my short hair. My hair is now easier to manage. Drying it takes only a few mins, no styling necessary, the messier, the better!
5. Dreaming of a new MacBook!
Trust me, I have been dreaming of this for more than 1 year now. I kept telling me friends that I will buy it soon...but until now, I'm still stuck with this old notebook, which is extremely temperamental. It hangs whenever it wants to, it resets itself automatically without being told, it loads things which I did not ask for...etc...you get the idea. I have reformatted it before, but the problem persisted. So I really would like to change it, bcoz it is doing my head in. Guess it is time to make my purchase soon...but having spent so much money buying stuff for this flat....think I should postpone it will next month.
hmmm.....
The only thing lacking here is my friends and K in Glasgow. Sigh. Glad that he's coming to join me this weekend...and mummy n daddy will be here too!!!! how exciting! =)
My first weekend here was pretty boring. I spent most of the time at home, reading and cleaning up the flat. Guess I need to find more things to do, and of course, make new friends to hang out with. Moving down here has certainly opened up a new chapter in my life....and as much as everyone hates changes, I think it will only make you stronger, and it pushes one to get out of his/her own comfort zone.
CHEERS TO MY NEW FLAT!
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
What is the point?
What is the point of having your own outpatient clinic?
What is the point of having a timetable created to your own needs?
What is the point in smiling but not listening?
What is the point in what is the point??
And more importantly, what is the point in even bothering?!
.........................uurrgghhh............I DON'T KNOW!!
I am so frustrated today. I don't understand how a consultant can be so slow in reviewing patients at the outpatient clinic. This consultant has a timetable created to suit his/her needs...but he/she has failed to follow it correctly!!!
I mean, how difficult is it to complete your ward round on monday, rather than postponing it to another day, in which you are busier?
There are at least 30 patients in the outpatient clinic awaiting review...and this consultant only saw 5 of them?!
HELLO??? ARE YOU HAVING A LAUGH??
arghh well. What is the point in even moaning as I can't change the situation? I just have to suck it up....that's what it is.
Thursday, July 09, 2009
26 days and counting
All the chaos and stress in applying for a new job began about 6 months ago....and finally being told I have secured a new job down south a few months thereafter, seemed so long ago.
I am having mixed feelings about it all. I have to admit that I am slightly excited about the whole thing, you know, moving down to a new place, new environment, entering the English health board, and, living in a new flat on my own (for the first time!).
On the other hand, I don't like the feeling of leaving my current cosy flat and a few of my friends here in Glasgow. In fact, I feel extremely heavy-hearted to leave Glasgow itself! I can't believe I actually just said that. I recalled the first time I moved down here from Dundee, I felt so miserable....I didn't like the environment, didn't like the transportation system, didn't like the people....but that's all changed now.
As much as the weather is always wet, I think I would really miss it. There were Scottish bag pipers playing their tune while I was walking along Buchanan and Sauchiehall Street last weekend. And I thought to myself, "Man, I am going to miss this....the shopping is great, and where in England, would you hear the sound of bag pipes whilst shopping?"
I soon found out that the people here are friendly....and the transportation system is pretty reliable.
Anyhow, I think it is always difficult moving out from your comfort zone. I mean, why would someone leave a place that he or she is so comfortable with?
This will be a new challenge for me.
26 days and counting....
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Was That Even Necessary?
I had a few encounters with my work colleagues recently during my weekend on call. I am a pretty easy going person. But I really could not tolerate those who are irrational.
I received a referral from the A & E department about an elderly gentleman who is now having difficulty swallowing and persistent vomiting. As a result, I was told he looked quite dehydrated. I said, "That's fine...just send him up to our medical ward for further assessment." Later, I received a phone call from the managers that his admission was highly inappropriate. First of all, I was told by this colleague of mine that I do now know this patient at all (which is very true...I have never met him before...so therefore, assessment is even more imperative, no?). Then, our conversation went on like this:
Colleague X: What are you going to do about his swallowing problem over the weekend?
ME: Well, there isn't much we could do over the weekend, until he comes extremely unwell, he which he may require an urgent endoscopy. Otherwise, we should give him IV fluids and make sure he hasn't aspirated."
Colleague X: Exactly. You can't do anything for him over the weekend. If he were to get a scope...you can only do it on Monday, so why bother admitting him?
Again, I had to repeat myself.
Colleague X: I find it really hard to understand why someone with your capabilities would want to admit that patient from A&E.
I was utterly shocked and speechless.
ME: OK, look. If you think this patient is well enough to go home, why don't you document that in his notes, and discharge him from A&E. From my point of view, as I haven't laid my eyes on the patient, I would not know if he is fit for discharge. If anything happens to him, I am the one responsible because I am the person on-call.
I was arguing over the telephone! It was embarassing because I was speaking in the medical assessment bay where new patients were waiting to be seen. After a good 10 mins worth of arguement, we both put the phone down. I felt that it was complete unneccessary. I mean, I know we were verging on being short of beds, but I honestly could not simply discharge a patient without seeing him first. And I hate to say this, but, you are only in charge of the beds....you are not trained to assess whether the patient is fit enough to go home!!!
Urgh...I felt so frustrated after that.
Then, the next day, I received another mouthful from another colleague. This time it was because she thinks the patient has no comprehension of what was going on. She was unhappy that I told the patient about her diagnosis of cancer, and that she her prognosis was poor.
The thing is, this poor elderly patient of mine was clearly living the last few days of her life....and she hasn't been told what was causing her to feel so unwell. When I first assessed her, she could tell me the events leading to her hospital admission, she was well orientated to time, place and person! So on that basis, I felt she was able to understand what was going on.
This fellow colleague of mine, (lets name her Colleague G), was again being inappropriate.
Colleague G: Look, I find it shocking that you think she has even the slightest understanding of what is going on. She is completely off her head. She mumbles all the time! And you told her she has cancer?
Me: I completely respect that. But when I saw her, she was orientated, and was able to tell me her history. And she is my patient, she has the right to know....especially when she is so ill.
Colleague G: Well, I find that hard to believe. I have been a nurse for more than 20 years...and I know for a fact that she is utterly confused and has no comprehension.
Me: Ok...I know you have the experience. But even if she is that confused, she still has to be told.
I left the scene....and about 1 hour later, I received a phonecall from Colleague G. Mind you, I was on-call that day.
Colleague G: Ling, just for your information, I went back to ask the patient if she remembered talking to you. She said, she recalled that a doctor saw her, and she said something was wrong with my tummy. But she couldn't remember what was wrong with it. So there you go, for your information, she has NO CLUE what is wrong with her!
I was like WHAT?!!! Do you actually need to purposely call me to just prove a point?? Is there any need to do so??
No there isnt! Even she doesnt remember, I am still responsible for her, and she has the right to know.
Me: Ok then. Thank you for letting me know. (I was gritting my teeth while saying that). bye.
Man....what is wrong with these people?!
OR,
Maybe I have lousy clinical judgement. I dunno. This is so frustrating.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
The Best Gig Ever!
the greatest day of our livesbefore it all ends
before we run out of time
I LOVE TAKE THAT!!!!
They were my childhood favourite boyband! =D
It was my first time seeing them LIVE...and their CIRCUS tour 2009 was simple fantastic, extravagant, colourful....and simply mesmerising! They were supported by Gary Go and James Morrison.
The gig was at the Hampden stadium. I was glad I managed to get seating tickets, because the standing ones were so packed! The entire stage was designed to look like a circus. There were acrobats, a giant silver robotic elephant, fireworks, fire....... it was simply amazing!
They kicked off by singing "The Greatest Day." Then, when they started to dance their usual routine for Pray!!! It was really nice to see them reunited again. Every member of the band had the chance to take the lead vocals.
I love their outfits...they wore smart suits...and then, dressed up in clown uniforms, and painted their face in front of the audience. They each had a go at the unicycle too!
Also, when they sang my favourite song, "Back for Good," they created rain to resemble the music video. Take That sang most of their hit songs and songs from their current album "Circus."
This was certainly the greatest GIG so far!! The ticket was pricey...but I can understand why. 230 people were involved in it! Here are a few pics I took! And, I can't believe I spent some money buying their merchandise! I am really a big FAN!!!!
Bring on more good music, Gary, Howard, Jason and Mark!!! =)
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Simple, yet Memorable
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Yet Another Year
Yeap, its my birthday today. I can't believe how fast time has flown by! I am just glad that I'm still the same, apart from the worsening eye bags and wrinkly face. =P
I did not run any marathon or 5k or 10k last year. I did not travel to any EU country either, surprisingly! The year was filled with work most of the time, and moaning about the stresses at work. I spent alot of time sorting out paperwork for job interviews and also to allow my supervisor to gauge whether I'm fit enough to pass this year.
However, I did manage to get some time off to go back home, which was lovely!
Also, I've noticed that my immune system has been super low. I have been ill, again and again. Glad to say that my sore throat and cough are both away....but I am now bothered with Hay Fever! sigh....the pollen levels are quite high these days.... I have been sneezing my nose off so much....scratching my eyes too.
This year, I will be faced with a new challenge. I will be moving down south, working a brand new environment, and coping with living by myself. Excited? I don't know actually. I'm having mixed feelings about it all. I am pretty excited about the new hospital, but not too excited about moving here on my own. The fact that the town has been rated as the worst place to live in UK, is not helping either. Guess I have to just get on with it. Will see how it goes. I am quite stressed now just having to look for a place to live!
Anyway, Happy Birthday to me. Here's wishing me the best of health and luck this year!
CHEERS!
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
Hello!
I've been ill....AGAIN! Then, busy with work and on-calls.
Now, I have recovered alot....but still have this tickly cough, which is worse at night, when I try to sleep. As a result, I don't get much sleep! =(
Anyway, work has been tiring...and I really HATE (maybe this word is too powerful), or rather, I DISLIKE CARDIOLOGY!
Help! I'm drowing in the sea of ECGs, ETTs, and echocardiograms! The clinics are just too outrageously overbooked for 2 person....the new patient clinics are total chaos....just because on the same day, I have to arrange various tests for the patients, and following these tests, they will see me again to get the results. So the coordination goes haywire ...and the waiting time stretches...patients become unhappy....and the vicious cycle carries on!
sigh. On a brighter note, I have managed to get all my paperwork sorted...and my educational supervisor has signed me off! yay!
have a good day everyone.
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
Immune System @ Its Lowest
Having recovered from that, I developed a really bad sore throat 5 days later. The following morning, my throat was so painful that it was difficult to even swallow..... and then, my nose started to run.
Lucky for me that I am on my annual leave. So I could take the time to recuperate. However, I would also like to use my days off to enjoy the sun and do things I like! But, sadly, the weather has been miserable. And, my nose was completely blocked over the past 3 days. It is alot better now, thanks to the antihistamine and pseudoephidrine tablets. I literally could not taste or smell anything.
My kind housemate even made me an aromatherapy steam inhalation thingy....and I could not even smell the scent!!! But the inhalation was great....it did help to decongest my nose a wee bit.
Now that I am much better, guess what? Today, I had a really bad splitting headache. I thought it was because I was hungry...so I had some sugary stuff. But the headache persisted. I took some paracetamol to no effect. Dehydration? Probably not, as I have been at home all day, and definitely drinking plenty of fluids. Therefore, I decided that I needed to rest. I hid under my covers for a few minutes...but my head continued to ache..
Guess it must be some really bad viral illness I have been suffering from over the past weeks. I do hope I get better soon.... my immune system is absolutely rubbish at the moment. I better infuse myself with more Vit C.
Anywho, time to go to bed now. Hopefully my sleep will put an end to my headache. Shoooo schleeppy.....yyawwwnnn...... Nite nite.
Sunday, May 03, 2009
The Best X-Men Ever!
I went to watch X-Men Origins: Wolverine!
This is the best X-Men movie so far! Loved it! Thumbs up!
The story was fantastic.....the casts were great...and for once, at least, I understood what they were fighting for...rather than the previous X-Men series. And, I didn't really like Jean Gray.
In this series, there were plenty hot casts. One of them was Gambit. I was just a little disappointed that he didn't perform much. Also, Wade was really cool. Hugh Jackman was being his usual charming self. His girlfriend (Lynn Collins) was gorgeous....and her sister, was superbly cool! I wished I have skin like hers!
hehe....so yes, please go watch it! I am so looking forward to Transformers and Terminator!
ps....my sincere apologies to those who heard me snuffling in the cinema!
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
I Hate Hospitals!
Yeap. I am talking about dying patients. I know, I know, I have repeated myself so many times about how much I am saddened seeing patients die in front of my eyes. I am going to blog about the same thing again today....coz I AM gutted! I know hospitals are pretty unpleasant to be in anyway.
Sigh. There is a pleasant lady in the hospital who is only in her mid 50s. She suffered so many complications from this abnormal mass in her abdomen. It was only 4 months later that we finally got to the bottom of her problem. We found out that she has cancer. Unfortunately, I think her illness is rather extensive, ie, the mass is pretty big, and her general well being does not allow for a surgical operation. Chemo would not be much benefit either.
In simple words, she is dying. It is very upsetting. She is such a lovely lady. Her family are all so nice. I hate seeing them, crying away in another room, and then, to enter their mother's room, putting on a brave front. I highly respect them for being so supportive. My heart goes out to them.
I mean, looking at her today, she looked awful.....extremely pale and green. It is certainly not a good sign. I could just feel myself welling up when I saw her. She just went downhill so quickly. Sigh. I hate hospitals when it comes to things like this. =( Booo....
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Highly Inappropriate
Hands down who agree that it is INAPPROPRIATE to do so.
hmmm......
Recently, I was treating a patient with widespread cancer to the lungs, liver and also, the bones. He was ill. We initially gave him a course of antibiotics to treat his sepsis. He did improve a little.... but after that, he never picked up again. He became increasingly dehydrated, lethargic and more unresponsive.
His swallowing was impaired, just because of his decreased consciousness. The SALT (Speech & Language Therapist) also asked to review, and she, too, was in agreement that he should not be allowed to swallow as he would be at a very high risk of aspiration.
Funnily enough, the nursing staff decided to refer this poor patient onto the dietitian. This dietitian, then, wrote in the notes the following:
" Note patient is unable to swallow. Patient would not be able to meet nutritional requirements. Consider parenteral feeding (such as via nasogastric tube or intravenously)."
I was appalled when I read that. Why would somebody attempt to force feed a dying patient? Should we not let the patient die peaceful, rather than, jamming a NG tube down his nose or poking him numerous times to gain IV access?? And, what benefit would he get by feeding him? I mean, honestly, why do you want to feed him and prolong his suffering??
I really did not get that at all.....and I felt that it was a highly inappropriate suggestion! Anyone beg to differ?
Monday, April 27, 2009
My Rotations are Out!
And I am pleased to say that I am very glad to have been allocated my top rotations! =D
I will be based in JCH at Middlesbrough for 8 months, then, I will move to North Tees for another 8 months, and finally finishing my last 8 months back at JCH. My rotations include the usual core medical stuff, ie, cardiology, respiratory, gastroenterology, diabetes and endocrinology....but they also include infectious diseases and ITU! yay! I really wanted to do both of them..and I will be!
Now, the flat hunting begins!
Thursday, April 23, 2009
The Best I've Felt for The Week!
I felt so miserable. I was acutally having a lovely dinner at this nice Italian restaurant, called Battlefield Rest, when it all started. My body started to ache all over. My beef lasagne tasted really good, but I was struggling to finish it. When I got back, I was so tired and sleepy....not long after that, my tummy started to hurt. It felt bloated and uncomfortable. I also felt feverish.
This lasted all day Saturday. On Sunday, I felt alittle better. But, again, could not master the appetite to eat anything! I dragged myself through 2 long days of calls on Monday and Tuesday....and by Wed, I was absolutely done in.
I slept really early that night....and guess what? I was feeling nearly 100% on Thursday morning...and now, I'm back to my usual self! My tummy is rumbling because of hunger...and I could actually finish my meals! Its certainly the best I've felt all week!
I'm really gonna take it slow and easy this weekend...but I have managed to sneak in a few little choc pieces today at work...keke... I know, I know, I should really keep off the chocolate...but, but, but, they were dark chocolate...and they are meant to be good for you! :o)
Have a good weekend!
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Congratulations!
Lets go get some champagne!
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Could I Have a G & T Please?
So at times like this...we, doctors, need to humour ourselves.
Cancer patients who receive chemotherapy are at risk of developing neutropaenic sepsis. For those without a medical background, neutropaenic means having a low white cell count (white cells are important to fight infection), while sepsis, means infection. So, when your body is low in white cells, you have low immunity, therefore, would be prone to develop different types of infections.
Different hospitals have different hospital protocols for treating neutropaenic sepsis. In my hospital, we like to give our patients G & T!
Yeah, G & T.....Gin & Tonic.
Gin is a spirit which is flavoured with juniper berries. Apparently, juniper berries have medicinal values. They act as a diuretic and also an appetite stimulant. The latter being extremely important in patients with cancer, as their appetite is normally quite poor. I mean, if you think about it, when your appetite is poor, your nutritional intake would be inadequate, and as a result, your body would not have the energy to resist infections....don't you agree??
Well, no, as much as I would like to think that Gin & Tonic could heal infections.....actually G & T stands for Gentamicin and Tazocin...which is a good combination of antibiotics to treat neutropaenic sepsis. =P
See...it is quite pathetic, I know...but at least it lifts the spirits of our patients up, when you joke with them about their antibiotics.
Having said that, I've heard that in certain special circumstances (ie, where conscious patients who are nearing their end of life or around christmas period), a small dose of alcohol has been prescribed on their drug chart, if it was requested by the patients, and if the doctors were given the green light by their boss. Being in hospital is pretty miserable...so we like to keep some of them happy! Cheers!
Monday, April 13, 2009
Unhelpful Surgeons
Yesterday, a cardiac arrest call was put out. We were directed to the acute surgical admission ward, where, an elderly man was extremely breathless....his face was blue....his heart rate went up to 160 beats per minute. He was admitted for problems with per rectal bleeding. I wondered whether he may have developed a pulmonary embolism (a blood clot in his lungs), or became very short of breath because of anaemia.
At the scene, the surgical reg was standing....asking for an anesthetist....who eventually arrived after a few minutes. Having examined the patient, I told him my thoughts and actions. He said "ok." While I was busy asking the nurses to give me a few medications, I soon realised that suddenly, no one from the surgical team was there with the patient. I didn't think much about it initially. The patient settled down alittle, but was still not well. I tried to look around for the surgical reg...and I later found out that he has left to go to A&E! I was like, WHAT?!
He left me to sort his patient out.....by myself?! I mean, honestly, I can understand that you have a sick patient down in A&E, but you should not just leave without even informing me! That is very unthoughtful and down right rude. The problem was I do not know what his plans were for this elderly gentleman from his surgical side. It became difficult for me to make up a plan too. I was appalled by his behaviour.
I dunno about other docs. But I have honestly admit that I do find surgeons extremely difficult to work with. I mean I can understand that they would lack experience in managing medical problems...and I would struggle to manage surgical problems. However, more often than not, we, medical people, do not hesitate to say, "yes we will take over the patient's care." Unfortunately, this is not the same for the surgeons. For example, I have found patients with Ischaemic bowels who is not fit for surgery, being left in the medical wards....or patients with acute pancreatitis. They are just very unhelpful. Imagine, if we leave a patient with fast AF in their surgical wards...they will be screaming at us to take the patient over. Anyway, think I have ranted enough.
There are a minority of surgeons who are really good....but as I said, MINORITY.
